What’s with the labels?

MombieI waited until I was 30 to have kids (which I hear is becoming more prevalent.) Add to that the fact that I have a ton of friends that are still childless & this puts me in a really weird place. Half of my friends have teenagers now because they had their kids in their late teens/early twenties and then the other half can’t even understand having children. Somehow this seems to make everyone around me want to label me.

Those with teens want to either give me constant advice on how to dodge the PTO & how not to get sucked into making lunches and going on field trips or they want to tell me all the special things they were involved in with their kids and how I MUST do them!!!

The childless friends beg me not to become a “mombie” & wonder how anyone could want to talk about their child or, heaven forbid, post pictures of them. (What the hell am I thinking right?…)

And so begins the constantly being labeled…

I just don’t understand why people can’t accept that some moms are a little of both. No, I do not want to talk about my kids nonstop and honestly love having adult conversations that don’t even require them being mentioned. However, I do have two kids and, I have to tell you, I think they are pretty bada$$. I don’t ever want to lose my identity and become just a mom but at the same time, I am proud to have my babies. They are two of the most important people in my life.

Do I think going on every field trip and being the class mom sounds fun? H*ll no! I can’t imagine being able to hold my tongue without screaming at that many kids for eight hours. I am sure by day’s end I’d have half the class crying. But, I love making my daughter’s lunch. I love that she comes home almost daily all excited and happy because her friends oohed and aahed over the outfit her mom made her. Do I want to be a stay at home mom forever? Omg no! I would lose my mind staying here every day forever but I sure am enjoying it while they are little.

I make sure to take daily pics of my kids so I can see how they are growing throughout the year and I am forever pinning ideas on Pinterest for creative things to do with them. However, I don’t play with my kids 24/7; they have to learn to entertain themselves sometimes. I don’t know the words to every cartoon theme song (I would off myself if this ever happened) and I don’t play kidz bop tunes in the car.

When I decided to have kids I knew I never wanted to give up being me but I wanted a new me. We all evolve over our lives. Once my kids came along some things had to change. Instead of all nighters listening to live bands downing margaritas, it is now having wine after the kids are in bed. Instead of sleeping in on weekends till noon, its now getting up at 7:00 to make sure the kids don’t tear down the house. Rather than blaring rap music in the car (which my husband is thankful for), its now country or oldies. I can’t pick up at the drop of a hat and run off to an event if a friend calls last minute but I do have weekends full of making memories. I may not be able to make every sports game if I don’t have a sitter but sure did get a kick out of watching my son at his first soccer practice pull down his pants and proceed to pee midfield. I can’t run off to go dancing when the mood hits me but I get to watch my little girl all dressed up, dancing in her first recital.

We all change as we age, some of us in different ways. I definitely did not become a mombie but if you can’t handle hearing about kids you probably shouldn’t follow my posts. You won’t see me wearing mom jeans and speaking baby talk to my kindergartener but you just might see me at the next PTO meeting or helping at a local car wash for my kids’ sports teams.  My point is that I am just myself and I live the kind of life that works for me and my family. You don’t have to agree with every thing I do and I don’t expect that you will have the same kind of lifestyle. However, don’t judge me, don’t question me and surely don’t label me. I can assure you, whatever label you want to hand out won’t fit. I am a million different things, none of which would fit into a mold. Who knows, maybe this is what today’s mom looks like….

Who let you have an animal?

So, to start us off right, I suppose we should have a full fledged rant for our first post. For anyone that gets to know me, one of the first things to become apparent is my love for animals. Yes, I know I have two small children but lets be real, they are like small bipolar people and my dogs do not talk back. Hence, my undying love to my pups.

Now, I am not the norm and I get that. I know most people do not make their own dog treats or spend more on a doggie spa during vacations than a hotel room for myself. They don’t agonize every year when their animal has a birthday because that is one less year you have with them or do any of the countless other things I do for my furbabies. However, they should at least be a somewhat decent owner or else why have a pet?

I do not get why people have pets if they can’t afford them or don’t have time for them. So, for our first post I have devised my list of reasons you should maybe rethink being a pet owner:

1. You can’t afford to get their shots. (This should really be a no-brainer but apparently not everyone thinks a pet has to be vaccinated. If you don’t have the money for this you should probably rethink that dog or cat.)

2. You don’t have time for them. (Now, this may come as a shock to you, but those little things have to eat too. If you don’t have time to feed and water them, take them for a walk or any of the countless other things they need then DON’T GET A PET!)

3. You have small kids you can’t appropriately watch. (This one is a big one for me. I cannot tell you how often I want to throat punch someone when I see them allowing their child to carry around a cat or other animal by the legs or, better yet, laughing at it. Would you want someone constantly poking you, grabbing at you, screaming at you and tugging at your body parts? Yeah, I didn’t think so. Watch your kids or…. DON’T GET A PET)

4. You plan to throw them outside and forget about them. (Have you ever heard the saying  “A dog is the only thing in this world that loves you more than he loves himself?” Think about that…. A pet lives for you: to hear your voice, to feel you pet them, to sit in your lap. I get not all dogs are small and cannot stay inside but if you plan to have no interaction with them then…DON’T GET A PET!)

 

So, before you head out to find that new animal, try out our checklist. Is this a temporary decision or do you plan to make this little guy a member of your family? Can you take out five mins when you get home to pet them before going about your life? Can you keep a pet alive? Can you give them the love they deserve? Think about it…..